Two men walk towards a cafe in the Mariahilfer Strasse. One them is very tall and broad shouldered and walks with a confident demeanour. The other is short and thin and seems a little unsure of himself.
As they walk the large man says to the smaller man:
"Why is it," he says, "why is it that when I walk my steps ring out echoing from the houses, but when you walk all I can hear is just the soft pitter patter of tiny feet?"
The little man, Heini, doesn't answer, but looks mournful. They walk into the cafe and sit down and the large man calls the waiter:
Hey waiter, "Ein Grosser Brauner" for me and a "Ein Kleiner Schwarzer" for my companion, said the man.
"But...but..." said the little man.
Covering up the little man's objections, in a loud voice, Rudi orders two large slices of strudel. In the following silence, while they wait for the waiter, Rudi asks Heini rhetorically:
"Tell me, why is it that when I talk even the chandeliers rattle, but when you talk everyone has to lean forwards to hear you?"
The coffee and strudel arrive. Rudi quickly eats his strudel in two bites and gulps down his coffee. Hieni, disheartened just takes a bite and a sip.
"And why is it," said Rudi, "that when I eat; snap, snap, snap, it's gone. Like a Lion eating its prey. But when you eat it's nibble, nibble nibble just like a tiny little mouse."
After the cake and the coffee they both have to go to the toilet and piss. After a while the large man reflects:
"Isn't it curious; when I piss it sounds like the great roaring of a waterfall, but when you piss I can't even hear a tinkle."
The little man looks up at Rudi.
"That's because I'm pissing on your leg."
As they walk the large man says to the smaller man:
"Why is it," he says, "why is it that when I walk my steps ring out echoing from the houses, but when you walk all I can hear is just the soft pitter patter of tiny feet?"
The little man, Heini, doesn't answer, but looks mournful. They walk into the cafe and sit down and the large man calls the waiter:
Hey waiter, "Ein Grosser Brauner" for me and a "Ein Kleiner Schwarzer" for my companion, said the man.
"But...but..." said the little man.
Covering up the little man's objections, in a loud voice, Rudi orders two large slices of strudel. In the following silence, while they wait for the waiter, Rudi asks Heini rhetorically:
"Tell me, why is it that when I talk even the chandeliers rattle, but when you talk everyone has to lean forwards to hear you?"
The coffee and strudel arrive. Rudi quickly eats his strudel in two bites and gulps down his coffee. Hieni, disheartened just takes a bite and a sip.
"And why is it," said Rudi, "that when I eat; snap, snap, snap, it's gone. Like a Lion eating its prey. But when you eat it's nibble, nibble nibble just like a tiny little mouse."
After the cake and the coffee they both have to go to the toilet and piss. After a while the large man reflects:
"Isn't it curious; when I piss it sounds like the great roaring of a waterfall, but when you piss I can't even hear a tinkle."
The little man looks up at Rudi.
"That's because I'm pissing on your leg."
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